Home

Sometimes I wish I was a tortoise. Why? So I can bring my 'home' wherever I go.

I used to look weirdly at people who carried their ratty, tattered, ugly, smelly blankie/pillow/teddy around. But I may have been just as bad as them (or even worst).

Some people grow attached to one thing that reminded them of home. Of the safe place. Somewhere where they are comfortable and welcomed.

Me, I grow attach to many things. While some think that I was a pack rat, I actually was trying to bring everything I need to make a new home. I don't grow attached to stuff, I just want 'my' stuff. Maybe this stems from not having to share anything with anyone since I was raised like I'm the only child. I don't share. What I need I usually have.

Everytime I move into a new dorm room, I have to lug every item I think I would need. That's the only way I would feel okay. Most of the time, I wouldn't need half of the stuff I bring. But I don't care. I feel great knowing that if I ever need it, it's somewhere near. Not back home where I can't have it.

Packing light when I travel? Not a chance! As long as there are spaces I can fill, I will fill it. Even if I will hurt my back trying to lug it around, I will do it. Just the thought of not having things that I actually have when I needed it freaks me out. So yeah, going backpacking might not be best for me.

Yes, I carry my own pillow and blanket around if I could. Not because I'm attached to them, I just didn't like using other people stuff. Of have to sleep without it. I have been put in many situation that is not an ideal place to sleep, but as long as I have my blanket and pillow, I'm good to go. Since I'm sensitive to smell and sight, borrowing other people stuff could cause problems.

This time around, I try to minimize the stuff I brought to my dorm. Bad idea. This is why I'm home right now. I'm always on edge thinking about the stuff that I could have had that was just lying around at home.

I apologize to those that I make fun of before. I now understand the need to have something that makes you comfortable. Be it a blanket, pillow, teddy bear or the entire content of your room. But please do wash those stuff that you have since you're a baby. It's just gross. And unhygienic.